I pray you never wonder what you need to fix.

Same Dress. Different Me. 

Ten years ago I wore this fancy red dress only I did not feel so fancy. I walked into an event and I began to receive compliments but I did not feel worthy of being complimented. 

I was wearing my public mask trying not to let the unhappiness that resided in me show. I was broken on the inside. The world I existed in was filled with heartache, betrayal and uncertainty in who I was. I felt like I had no value. 

I was carrying a load of pain that on the inside was destroying my essence. I was ashamed of what my reality was. I was a woman dealing with the ultimate betrayal. It was not a secret that could be hidden. It was alive and residing in the reality of my life. 

The effects kept me on edge and made me untrusting. It made me angry and bordering on bitterness. My smile had no luster. My hope was in question. I was a shattered mess in a fancy dress. 

I recently wore my fancy red dress. When I slipped it on this time the confidence I needed ten years ago was living inside me. The  happiness I was missing was in place. The beauty I did not feel shined from within and was attached to peace.  I did not need to adorn my public mask. 

I now know who I am. I am a woman of strength and resilience. 

Rocking a regal and fancy red dress. I shined like the Queen I am. I was no longer bitter or angry. I am a survivor of hopelessness.  My smile is bright and my confidence can  not be shaken. I am a conqueror. 

I took the compliments with humility, but I also beamed with pride. I knew my story. I did not look like what I have been through. 

Even without the fancy dress I walk in my beauty. It’s more than an outer shell. I celebrate my journey and I rebel against anyone who tries to make me feel indifferent about myself. 

A decade of trials. A decade of triumphs. I am unapologetically dope and love everything that this journey is shaping me into. I am excited about the growth I will continue to gain. 

I am bold and beautiful. I am phenomenal. I no longer allow pain to be what I wear. I am clothed in confidence and peace. A decade of pain produced an opening to my purpose. Same dress. Different me. Beautiful and loving. Worthy and free. Shining bright like the Queen I am.